Wednesday, August 29, 2012

And a broken arm.....

Are you ready for some football???!!! Are you ready??!!!

Well, we aren't.... This past Sunday Tommy had his first game with the Lil Cavs. He has practiced four days a week for the past month and a half. This year he is on the varsity team (age determines this not skill... not that he couldn't be on a varsity team.... but it's safe to say age determined this one).

Woot! Go #68, kick some a*#!
(And in honor of playing for a Catholic school, say a Hail Mary while you're at it...)

Now, there is nothing the Hamlins love more than football season. Our family represents the Bengals (Who Dey!), the Giants, the 49ers, and the Broncos (yes, Dan is back to Denver but if you ask me Peyton ain't no Elway). As you can see not one of us likes the same team so there is always a good chance of a little screaming and yelling at the TV, and sometimes each other (that's right I said he ain't no Elway!)

But as a mother who has painfully sat through countless football, soccer, basketball, hours of swimming, and piano concerts, I can honestly say there is nothing better than watching your own child suck at whatever sport he plays. And when your kids don't suck it's even better and more importantly how they trick you to sign them up for next season.

So back to my story....

It's 4th quarter and Tommy is in on defense. He is something-end...defensive... tight?? And as you can imagine from the title of this blog... he breaks his damn arm.

Why do my children do this to me?

Crying and stumbling off the field,  four coaches gather around him and I hear one say, "look there's his mom!" please don't be a broken arm, please don't be a broken arm, please don't be a broken arm is going through my head and when I make it over I see his poor little arm completely bent, as in curved in, sagging in the middle. Shit. I am so glad my entire family shows up for this game because they were so supportive but most importantly I didn't have to retell the entire story, play by play (no pun intended).

This wonderful trauma nurse from Wilson Memorial came over and wrapped his arm up and told us to go straight to Wilson. I politely said "there is no way in hell I am taking him there, we are going to Children's" Geesh... I guess some people just don't care enough about their children to give them the very best. So you know what we did? We got right in the car and drove straight to... Upper Valley Medical Center.... My poor baby was screaming in pain so I told Dan to pull the damn car over right now this child needs medical attention and drugs pronto!

I guess it was "losers go to the ER" day at UMVC because when we walked in that is just what we saw.. We should have gone to Children's.

The people at the front desk were so nice and moved us straight to the top of the list... seriously, they told us that. You know what "top of the list" gets you? An hour for pain meds, with a screaming crying 10 year old to remind you just how slow time can pass.

Usually I pride myself on being a compassionate person but when the doc walked in and apologized for taking so long because someone coded and "I had to save their life" I didn't even blink and thought, "so?..."

Once the IV was in, the world was a better place and I did give a shout out to Jesus that it was only a broken arm and not a Code of any color.

Standing in X-ray with the radiologist I happened to see the pictures scan on her computer screen and said "damn he broke clean through his ulna and radius". She asked if I was a nurse and almost bent over in hysterical laughter. "No I've just seen a few X-ray pics to know"

In case anyone is counting, this is our 6th broken bone. It's as if my boys are going for some kind of record.... Yes they drink milk, yes I watch them, no I wasn't like this as a child, of course Dan was. But in the end boys are just stupid and careless and I only say this because when Tommy broke his foot at the age of 4, I came home to Max (6 years old) telling me that Tommy just didn't make it over the last obstacle...  oh and because this is our 6th broken bone.

Long story short and five hours later they put him under to set the bone. And when I say "put under" I mean he was completely fricking awake. Oh there is this medicine they like to use on children because blah, blah, blah... respiratory.. blah, blah, blah.... less risk involved... blah, blah, blah.... He won't remember anything.

Two words. Bull Shit.

He was talking, his eyes were open and he screamed out when she pulled his arm to set the bone.  Ummm, that is called "your meds didn't work a-hole" not "put under".

And then I heard, "Is my mom here". I threw some elbows to get in his view, of course I am here baby!

And that is when I knew these meds did indeed work.

Me: Hey Tom, how are you buddy? I am so proud of you, you did great!

Precious Angel: Mom, you have four eyes. Am I levitating? Wow... Mom, you have four eyes. When are they going to start?

Me: What? Tommy it's over, do you remember?

Precious Angel: What?

Me: I said it's over buddy, you are all done!

Precious Angel: What? Wow... The room is spinning. I see two daddy's.

Me: You only have one daddy. Are you ok? How do you feel?

Precious Angel: Is this real life?

Me: Yes this is real life?

Precious Angel: Are you recording this?

Damn, why didn't I think to record this?

Me: Of course not, I would never do that sweetie.

And on and on it went until the meds wore off. And although I didn't record it, I did snap a picture to capture the moment.

You know some people measure the growth of their children on an old door jam, or a wall but we measure their growth by how big their casts get...

They just grow up to dang fast....

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

KOA= Awesome

Last weekend we tried for a close get-a-way, just us. This was the true test. Are we legit campers? Can we do this without the help of the awesome B family? Can we really handle two weekends in a row of campground fun??

As you would expect the answer is.... Yes! We sure are the camping family we knew deep down we were born to be! And with the dog....

We decided that if we were going to make a go of it we would have to be somewhere close to Max's soccer practice, after all our lives still revolve around the sporting events of 10 and 12 year olds. And in giving into the fact that Dan and I don't really have a life of our own, nor will we until they move out, we tried our hand at the nearest KOA.

KOA, for you non campers, means Kampgrounds of America and America let me tell you these people TOTALLY get camping. I am convinced this concept was designed by a mother who finally said to herself, "camping is bullshit, if I wanted to do this much prep, cooking, and entertaining all while swatting flies I would have stayed home". Yes, this very wise mother said...
  • "let there be a heated pool!"
  • " let there be mini golf, but a course that entertains my children for more than 5 minutes"
  • " how about a state of the art playset"
  • "oooh, really clean bathrooms so I don't have to clean mine"
  • "anyone up for a super clean dishwashing station with some steam action to get the job done?"
  • "those college kids need something to do, so I will hire lots to drive around and pick up your trash at your site, and deliver firewood, and do crafts with my children who claim there is never anything to do"
  • "And to top it all off let there be a cafe on site that DELIVERS pizza to your campsite, that also offers Boston Stoker coffee, ice cream, hamburgers, and hotdogs, and soooo much more."

And on the seventh day she poured herself a glass of wine and said "this is good". On behalf of all camping mothers I would like to say "Thank You" for making our lives easier.

Scroll down below for some pictures that capture the wonderful weekend this family had camping.

A perfect smore!

Tommy and I on the nightly hayride!

 Breakfast anyone???

How about some homemade waffles... yum!

Even Tom and Shirley stopped by for some camping fun (thanks for your money, you pretty much covered our nightly rate)

Look! It's Big Mike and Kris..... no bites though...

What? Texting and fishing???? Sure why not cause KOA has free Wi-Fi!!

Check out Tommy's piggy bank... Lookin' good buddy!

Morning coffee, my favorite time of day (minus jackass at my feet)

Danny and Max just hanging out...

It's our campfire yo!

Fun bike rentals!

Saturday night event.... Karaoke!

We are 2 for 2 people! Looking forward to our next adventure! Come on out and see us anytime!!

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

"Turn it to the left, no the tralior left! Ok, to the right, the right! F-it, it's fine, I'll grab a longer hose...

So I guess the trick to backing up a 28 footer is.... I don't know.... what is the trick??? We have been told by some very wise man, this guy specifically, that you place your hand at the bottom of the wheel and turn it the way you want the trailer to go but most importantly you go out and buy some walkie talkies. I assured him that my voice carries just fine thank you.

So here is how the first backing up went:
Dan: "How's it look? Am I on the curb?"

Me yelling though the window: "Yes"

Dan: "Well how close??! Are they on it or touching?"

Me yelling through the window: "Touching"

Dan: "What? I can't hear you! Are the tires touching?!"

Me directly facing my vocal chords at the window: "You need to pull up and back up again you are on the damn curb, just come out here and look! Are you using the mirrors?!"
*sidenote, as if we don't look inexperienced enough, Dan strapped on some mirror extenders that I can only describe to you as something you'd find on Dumbo....

Dan: "What? pull up or back?!!....

I think I might buy some walkie talkies, not that it will stop the yelling or that saying "over" after each sentence will get old.

Anyway, that was just at our house! Here is our very first camping adventure. Last week we went to Frontier Campground in Waynesville. It is very small and clean. The shower houses are nicer than my bathrooms (not hard to do with all boys but still..). And as we were exploring we noticed that we were the youngest people there by like 50 years. As Dan said, " I think this is were campers come to die". We went with our very experienced friends, who pull a 38 footer. They have been by our side every step of this process. Thank you B family!! Take a look at our setup! Isn't is cute how our awnings almost touch..

I'm not sure they have laughed this hard in a while but we are happy to provide comic relief to those in need...

You might be saying "But Katie, where is your dog?" Ahh yes the dog... I just couldn't do it the first time. I needed one trip dog free to see what type of camper I am. But just so you know Chewy did sleep in the camper with the boys and I the first night we had it home in front of our house (you're welcome neighbors)

So... Camping Trip #1 was successful! Even Buffy and Noah came to visit. Best line from Buffy: "There is no crying in camping Noah, I mean really... "

Here are just a few more pictures that portray what our camping is really all about: Here's to video games...

empty bottles...

and camper pies...


More to come...

Monday, August 6, 2012

We bought a camper!!

Remember your childhood days of camping? Remember the adventures of traveling to new places, undiscovered lands, and public showers where you had to wear "jelly shoes"? Weren't those the days?! The true feeling of relaxation, cooking over a campfire, swimming, horseshoes, camp friends, and tripping over camp stakes and strings. Oh how I loved my days of camping, really roughing it in the great outdoors. Nothing but a sleeping bag, pillow, and box fan with a 50 foot extension cord running from the nearest outlet.

For the past several years Dan and I have reminisced about those joyful memories. As we travel to our luxurious hotel accommodations of previous vacations we would pass those lucky RV owners, admiring their life and soon to be adventures. And as they pass we would look at each other and smile and say "shitter's full" and chuckle. We felt like we were missing out on the real American dream! It's time to break out the jelly shoes and marshmallow roaster sticks.

This is the story of our new life as travel trailer owners. You get to witness the life of two boys, a dog, and a camper....